Burning Man: Absurdity On Wheels

Mr. Potato Head art car

I'm dragging my feet through the Black Rock Desert under the scorching summer sun. My skin is burnt and crusty; my entire body covered in a white layer of salty, dessicated powder. I'm reaching for the lasts of my warm electrolyte powder-filled water when I suddenly hear a parade of 1940s big band music. I turn around to see a flat wood platform on wheels with a five piece jazz band slowly rolling up behind me.

"Hop on!" they say as I continue to walk next to them. "Come on!" they urge enthusiastically. The saxophonist reaches out a hand and I jump onto the moving stage. Behind the drum kit, I see an old, fading brown couch; something someone's parents stuck in the garage for the kids to eat pizza and play video games on after the remodel. I sink in between the ripped, absorbent cushions. A wave of relief washes over me.

My weary legs are recuperating and a new friend aboard hands me an ice cold beer. We continue our journey. The band's jamming and I'm sprawled out in the back staring up at the blue sky. We aimlessly cruise around the festival, smiling and waving at appreciative passersby who do a little spin or dip as a nod to the live soundtrack. Just as I think it can't get better, two rods protrude from the center of the platform and starting showering me with cool mist. Once again, an art car to the rescue.

There are hundreds of these "mutant" vehicles driving around Burning Man each year.

They're made from cars, trucks, golf carts or any other kind of motor vehicle that's been converted to go no faster than five miles per hour and has been dressed up to look nothing like its original form. When out at the festival you'll see every shape and size of art car; big furry marine animals covered in LED lights, pirate ships, magic school buses, flaming dragons, genie bottles...you name it.

They all offer different amenities on board: cushy seating, DJs, full bars, stripper poles, dance floors and every other kind of bell and whistle you can imagine. At nighttime they transform the landscape; glowing mobile sculptures that trickle the horizon with a blinking neon rainbow.

Yes, that's a flaming octopus

They're a party on wheels and most have speakers so loud they vibrate the desert floor miles away. Day or night, classical music playing cupcake or bluegrass boot, they're a hitchhiker's dream and at Burning Man, everyone's welcome to a ride in style.